It's the beginning of the year. The gyms are full for the next couple of weeks; there's a marked uptick in sales of books and downloads of podcasts dedicated to self-improvement and fitness and diets and keto.
Resolutions, however, are bullshit. Let me explain what I mean by that.
With the turning over of the new year and an increase in the number of hangovers nursed — so many people want to make themselves a little bit better in 2019 than they were before. The common thread of how to make that improvement happen is by committing to a New Year's Resolution. One goal for the year that is often so vague many people don't even know where to begin. Also, these goals are typically designed around a "will" statement. I will quit smoking this year. I will get fit this year. I will fix my toxic relationships this year.
Having a desire to improve oneself is not a bad thing. But hanging your hat on a single goal that is a far reach is decidedly futile. I think the reason for this is that progress towards the completion of many resolutions is slow-going when people want to experience immediate results. When people don't see the results they want in the short time they want, people feel as though they've failed and decide to abandon the resolution.
It's a horrible way to start your year — having high hopes of what you want to achieve within the first few weeks of the year, then abjectly hating yourself for not reaching it immediately. It's a shit way to live, but people do it to themselves every. single. year.
Now that I've finished my subpar explanation of why I think resolutions are bullshit, I'm going to do an even worse job proposing an alternative: The Yearly Theme.
Just listen to those words in your head. Mull them over a bit. Do you hear the choir of angels in the background? If so, reading my shitty article won't help you — you've got more serious problems that need addressing.
I was first introduced to the idea of a yearly theme back in 201 through the podcast Cortex. CGP Grey and Myke Hurley were discussing how resolutions are terrible in a much more lucid way than I did. A link to their first yearly theme episode can be found here. Why has it taken me so long to implement it? To tell a long story less long, I fell into a trap of essentially needing to think on my feet for the past couple of years. I didn't have too much time to think about what I genuinely want to do with my time until recent events transpired, even then I didn't have the motivation to do much of anything. But now I'm rambling, so I'll get back to the point.
On a recent episode of a podcast, I do with a good friend I broached the topic of yearly themes. Specifically, I decided on a theme for 2019: The Year of the Lethani. Fans of Pat Rothfuss will get the reference; most others will not.
The Lethani in Pat Rothfuss's series of books "The Kingkiller Chronicle" is a mentality, a credo, a lifestyle. Jesus, I sound like a new-age weirdo. The Lethani is described as both the mountain pass and knowledge of the pass, both being the right thing to do and knowing what the right thing to do is. The Lethani is described as a way to make the best of life, how to live properly, how to live with honor. I keep saying "is described as" because, in the book, no one truly knows exactly what the Lethani is. It is simply doing what the mantra of so many AA meetings I've attended, "the next right thing" is.
If you say that reminds you of a 12 Steps meeting or Taoism, you'd be right on both counts.
So, that's my yearly theme. Even though I don't completely understand the broader implications of everything that is happening, my goal is to know what is right for me to do and to act upon that. Is it a simple goal? Absolutely. Is it more attainable than getting "fit" or quitting smoking? I like to think so.
So, where do I begin on a yearly journey of trying to figure out the next right thing? I start right here, in front of a keyboard. I can say honestly that for most of my life the act of writing had always made me happy — even if I wasn't always happy when I was writing. The first step in finding the next right thing is doing things that make me happy and spending more energy on them instead of actively engaging in things that make me decidedly unhappy.
What are some things that make me unhappy? The general state of the world and national politics, sure. However, digging through the comments section in an article on Facebook in search of negativity isn't helping me sleep at night. It sure as hell isn't sparking joy a la Marie Kondo's flavor-of-the-day organizational fad. It is making the already tenuous state of my mental health deteriorate a whole hell of a lot faster than if I would ignore them.
What does make me happy? Writing something I believe in a way I enjoy — even when I use em-dashes in the wrong places.
I'd say that distinction is characteristic of The Lethani. Speaking up for what you believe is of The Lethani. Seeking out a fight on social media in a game where nobody wins and you feel sad afterward? That is not of The Lethani.
Is designing how you want to spend your year around a fictional path that isn't a path a good way to live? Is it of The Lethani?
Ask me in 2020 and don't forget to vote.